Tag Archives: Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris sorts out Livi bonus row!

24 Dec

Chuck Norris, yesterday

Livi Chairman Gordon MacDougall was forced to bring in top Hollywood actor Chuck Norris to mediate as a row over the players Christmas bonus threatened to erupt into fisticuffs yesterday.

 Chuck Norris makes Onions cry

Weeks of careful yuletide perk negotiations were thrown off balance when graffiti was found in trap 2 of the upstairs gents toilets at the BMC suggesting that McDougal was so tight that when he held a coin in the palm of his hand the Queen struggled for breath.

Chuck Norris can smoke underwater

MacDougal immediately called on the services of legendary Beverley Hills hard man, Norris (72), in an attempt to root out the vandal in order that the knife edge discussions could recommence.

By all accounts Norris ordered the players to return early from training and lined them up, in a line, in the stadium car park.

Chuck Norris can kick you with a punch

The hard as nails actor then proceeded to do 50 push-ups. Not as you’d expect however. No, he didn’t push himself up; he pushed the ground down.

Chuck Norris CAN talk about Fight Club

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