Tag Archives: MacDougall

Back to the future?

13 Dec

MacDougall's time machine, yesterday

Human time travel took a giant step closer to becoming a reality it was claimed last night, thanks to Livingston Chairman Gordon MacDougall’s miraculous new invention.

For in a series of dramatic events, MacDougall (54) stunned the scientific community by claiming he had successfully  converted his 1964 Trabant 601 into a fully functioning time machine, capable of defying the laws of time & space.

My wife

“I was in my golf club last week” he told the Tabloid yesterday from his secret workshop behind the bar in the Almondvale Suite of the British Motor Corporation Stadium, “when my wife hit me on the head in a highly comical way with an item of kitchenware.”

Amusing tumble

“Everyone was laughing as my spectacles fell on the floor when I took a slapstick tumble.  As I amusingly groped to find them in a Velma-from-Scooby-Doo sort of way, the idea for the Flex Capacitor suddenly jumped into my head.”

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Gordon MacDougall tells all!

1 Dec

McRaw, in happier times

The other day, writes a Tabloid reporter, the Tabloid brought you the shocking news of the sudden disappearance of  tvLIVI operative Stewart McRaw, 50, who apparently threw his toys out the pram after being denied the opportunity of a half time cup of tea during last Saturdays match versus Ross County at the BMC.

Well to do 

So in an attempt to locate the absent lollipop sucking video coadjutant the Tabloid sought out the advice of Morningside based Livi FC chairman Gordon MacDougall.

Gordon MacDougall, yesterday

5ft 1inch MacDougall, 85, warmly ushered our reporter into his strangely crowded front room and informed him that he was sick with worry at McRaws self enforced absence. When pressed on if he had any idea as to where McRaw could be MacDougall looked straight at our man with those sad, faraway eyes of his and said “who?”

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